C'est tres drole
by Lyra1
Summary: This is one of the very few humorous HDMs...tell me how you think i did...includes vivid scenes but no bad language....arrrrrrg


fanfic aboot won off me favorite storybooks

This is one of those I-don't-know-when-or-how-or-why-this-happened,-but-it-happened,-aight? stories. That established, let us begin...

**********************************************************************

The wind howled like a lost child out on the moor. Wait, that's not a good comparison. The wind howled like- like- the sound a thin man makes when a fat man falls on his head. Yes, that's it. Rather squishy sound, if I say so myself, but who's to blame?

Anyhoo, Lyra Silvertongue and Will Stanton were sitting away from the thin-man wind in a little cottage that wasn't theirs. In fact, they didn't know whose it was. All they knew was that they had found it after being lost up in the mountains from a ski trip. It was a lucky find too; if they hadn't found it, they might have met a squishy death. But let's not talk of such horrible things.

The cottage wasn't very lavish. Quite the contrary, it was a regular dump. But a warm dump. (Okay, those last two words were a bit odd.) It was just a wooden cabin with an ashy fireplace and a rotting table with two chairs. Oh, and a shelf built into the wall. Light came through from one small glass window, but not a lot of light, as night was falling.

"What are we going to do, Lyra?" ask Will, rubbing his earlobes, an activity he found calming and relaxing. In times of stress, he would rub other peoples earlobes, usually friends, but sometimes strangers. At first, Lyra found it a little unnerving that Will would run around in the street, stroking people's earlobes (the people either ran away or smiled and asked for more). However, she soon grew use to it. After all, everyone has their quirky habits and weird mannerisms.

"I don't know," she answered. "I left the alethiometer at the lodge with Mary. If only I had it now." She sighed wistfully.

Will put his arms around her. "Don't worry, we'll get out of here soon."

"And until then, this will just be another adventure." Lyra agreed, leaning her head against his shoulder.

"It's high time we had one." Will put in, smoothing back her hair, "The last adventure we had was two months ago, running from that, erm, eggshell, was it?"

"Eggshell? What?" Lyra asked, puzzled.

"Oh, uh, must have been another dream. Thought it sounded a little off." Will scratched his head, then gave Lyra's earlobe a tug.

Lyra smiled. Will kissed the tip of her nose, saying, "This actually isn't so-" 

Suddenly, a dark figure came in with a whirl of snow, slamming the door behind him...her...it? Lyra and Will backed away towards the farthest wall together. When they bumped into the cold wood, Will tensely asked, "Who goes there?" 

The figure took off it's hood, and got as far as, "You needn't worry, I-" before Lyra crashed into him in a warm embrace. 

"Roger! Roger!" she cried happily. "I didn't know you were here! How have you been?" 

Roger looked shocked. "Grandma? What happened to your face?" he asked. 

"No, no, it's me, Lyra!" she said joyously 

Will came forward. "So, Roger, we finally meet. I've heard so much about you." He offered his hand and smiled. 

Roger glanced at him, then turned to Lyra. "Is this-" 

"Will." she stated, still grinning. She turned back to Will and gave him a little hug. "I'm sure you guys will love each other!" 

Roger gave a slight nod to Will, whose smile faded as he dropped his hand and nodded in return. Lyra didn't seem to notice. 

"So," Will said, trying to loosen things up, "what are we going to do?" 

"Wait it out, I guess." Lyra shrugged. 

"That could take days." said Roger. "You wouldn't want to die here in this poor excuse for a shelter, would you?" He was looking at Will. 

"Well what do you suggest?" asked Will, his voice on an edge. 

Roger didn't answer. There was an uncomfortable silence. "Um, well, do we have anything we could use? I mean, look through your pockets." She pulled off her gloves and reached into her ski jacket. She only produced some pocket change, a few tissues and surprisingly, a mousepad 

Will found a ski rental notice and a rubber band in his pocket. Roger had nothing. "That's not much to live on." commented Will. He scratched his head. 

Roger saw the missing fingers. "What happened to your hand?" he asked. "Were you stuffing a turkey that suddenly came alive?" 

"Actually, no. But it's a long story." 

*********** 

Thaz it so far folks....whaddya think?


End file.
